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CONFLICT CHECKLIST

It is time to take action: Walk a problem through these questions.

Win/Win
What is my real need here? What is theirs? Do I want it to work for both of us?


Creative response
What opportunities can this situation bring? Rather than "how it is supposed to be", can I see possibilities in "what is"?


Empathy
What would it be like to be in their shoes? What are they trying to say? Have I really heard them? Do they know I am listening?


Appropriate assertiveness
What do I want to change? How will I tell them this without blaming or attacking? Is this a statement about how I feel, rather than what is right or wrong? (Be soft on the people, hard on the problem.)


Co-operative power
Am I using power inappropriately? Are they? Instead of opposing each other, can we co-operate?


Managing emotions
What am I feeling? Am I blaming them for my feelings? Will telling them how I feel help the situation? What do I want to change? Have I removed the desire to punish from my response? What can I do to handle my feelings? (e.g., write it down, talk to a friend, punch a mattress)


Willingness to resolve
Do I really want to resolve the conflict?
Is resentment caused by:
something in my past that still hurts?
something I haven't admitted to needing?
something I dislike in them, because I won't accept it in myself?


Mapping the conflict
Define briefly the issue, the problem area, or conflict in neutral terms that all would agree on and that do not invite a "yes/no" answer.
Who: write down the name of each important person or group.
Write down each person's or group's needs. What motivates him/her?
Write down each person's or group's concerns, fears or anxieties.
Be prepared to change the statement of the issue as your understanding evolves through discussion, or to draw up other maps of related issues that arise.


Designing Options
What are the possibilities? What seems impossible might yield good ideas. What options give us both more of what we want? Be creative, mix and match.


Negotiation skills
What do I wish to achieve? Be really clear about the general outcome, though you may change your route there. How can we make this a fair deal - with both people winning? What can they give me? What can I give them? Am I ignoring objections? Can I include them? What points would I want covered in an agreement? Is there something that could be included to help them save face? Is saving face important to me? Do I particularly need anything?


Mediation
A. Can we resolve this ourselves or do we need help from a neutral third person? Who could take on this role for us?
B. Is mediation the most appropriate role for me in this? If so, how would I set up and explain my role to both parties?
Can I create the right environment for people to open up, understand each other and develop their own solutions? What might help?


Broadening perspectives
Am I seeing the whole picture, not just my own point of view? What are the effects of this beyond the immediate issue? (e.g., on other people or groups) Where might this lead in the future?

PO Box 1016 Chatswood

E-mail: crn@crnhq.org 2057 NSW Aust

website: www.crnhq.org Ph +61 2 9419-8500

Fax +61 2 9413-1148

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One month before	Book an appropriate venue	Easy to get to via public transport. Convenient parking. Offers wheelchair access and facilities. Good acoustics, lighting, sound system, sight lines.
	Buttonhole key people	Find a first-rate facilitator and/or chair. Invite stakeholders who should speak (e.g., developer, City, neighbours). Find a host to prepare refreshments and help welcome participants. Arrange for a scribe and/or equipment to record all views. Ensure someone is familiar with all the presentation equipment.
	Prepare a timely and accurate meeting announcement	Venue (street address, directions) Time and date Issue to be discussed Intent of meeting Who is conducting the consultation? Sponsors and/or hosts Contact information for more information
	Advertise to obtain maximum participation	Distribute fliers to libraries, schools, community centres, health centres, community groups, neighbourhood residences, local shops and/or malls. Use neighbourhood Web pages, list serves, newsletters and other existing media. Provide interviews, public service announcements, perhaps advertisements for radio and television, daily press.
One week before the meeting	Finish pulling it all together	Confirm the booking. Familiarize yourself with the venue and request more chairs if needed. Identify and arrange for all speakers’ or consultants’ presentation needs. Prepare all material needed for the meeting, including registration forms, name tags, evaluation or feedback forms. Arrange child-care provisions, if appropriate. Consider providing a box of toys and play area for children if child-care cannot be arranged.
On the day of the meeting	Prepare the venue	Set up the room so that it is comfortable and functional. Set up the equipment and lighting and make sure it is working and located appropriately. Arrange refreshments so as to put participants at ease when they arrive. Set up a registration table at the entrance with name tags and information handouts etc. Set out presentation materials. Prepare all materials to be handed out at the meeting so that no time is wasted. Welcome people as they arrive.
During the meeting	Hear and honour all viewpoints	Begin on time. Be welcoming and enthusiastic. Restrict the time allocated to presenting information to around one quarter of the total session. Ensure that contact details of all participants are obtained. Make sure everyone can see and hear. Introduce the team members. Explain the context of the issue and where the consultation session fits in. Outline what will happen with the participants’ consultation input. Emphasize that the purpose of consulting is to obtain views and input and that it is not necessary to reach agreement. Allow input from all participants, whether through small groups or as a whole group. Allow one person to speak at a time. Ensure that all those who wish to be heard have been heard; encourage quiet people. Encourage respect for differing views. Listen to and record all views. Keep the discussion focused on the issues, not on personalities. Kindly rein in people who threaten to dominate or disrupt the proceedings.
	Wind up the meeting	Summarize and clarify the issues and points raised. Explain the feedback process and the next steps. Ensure that all participants have contact details for further information. Thank everyone for their participation. Hand out evaluation forms, if appropriate.
After the meeting	Follow up promptly	Prepare a summary report on the participant’s input. Distribute the report with an acknowledgment to all participants. If appropriate, place a copy of the report on the Internet and distribute more broadly (e.g., to Councillors, other neighbourhoods, via newsletters). Prepare the next phase of the consultation process.